a turd

My attending storms out of the bathroom and looks over at me, “It’s a fucking turd!”
Let’s back up a few minutes.
My patient has been having (if you are squeamish you might as well stop reading now) copious, purulent, pungent discharge coming out of her vagina for two months.  When I say copious, I mean she [...]

drunks

We were seeing a drunk guy who just happened to mention he wanted to kill himself (while blowing a BAL of over 0.3).  When the guy sobered up a bit he promised us he wasn’t being serious.  Begging for us to discharge charge him he cried, “Come on doc, I swear on my LIFE I [...]