a turd

My attending storms out of the bathroom and looks over at me, “It’s a fucking turd!”
Let’s back up a few minutes.
My patient has been having (if you are squeamish you might as well stop reading now) copious, purulent, pungent discharge coming out of her vagina for two months.  When I say copious, I mean she [...]

off-site

Last Thursday at my off-site hospital, I started off on the right foot. I got there early, and remembered to bring all my toys.
I sat down with the attending/preceptor to go over the H&P I turned in last week, and that’s when things started to take a turn for the worse. My classmate [...]

pink stethoscope

I just made my mother, who came home from the hospital today, put a pink stethoscope around her neck and pretend to be an attending. Poor woman. Just home from surgery, practically bed-ridden, and I’m already harassing her.
BUT I had to practice the oral presentation I have to give tomorrow afternoon.
Tomorrow morning I [...]